Articles écrits par moi et basés sur Un Cours en Miracles (French translations of my articles)
Part 6
6. The
Seeker’s Quest - A Story
8. The number one requirement for awakening is to
desire it above all else.
9. Summary of A Course in Miracles
(2017)
10.When working on yourself no longer works
11.Forgiveness, I need
do nothing and the witness (I Am)
Salvation can be seen as
nothing more than the escape from concepts.
A Course in Miracles T-31.V.14-3
Why
are you unhappy? Because 99.9 per cent of everything you
think, and of everything you do, is for yourself — and
there isn't one. Wei Wu Wei, (Terence
Gray)
In
our dreams last night we enacted certain roles, had
experiences and were certain of who we were. On waking we
see that nothing of the dream was real including
ourselves. But did we awake this morning?
Dreams
show you that you have the power to make a world as you would have it be,
and that because you want it you see it. And while you
see it you do not doubt that it is real. Yet here is a
world, clearly within your mind, that seems to be
outside. You do not respond to it as though you made it,
nor do you realise that the
emotions the dream produces must come from you. It is
the figures in the dream and what they do that seem to
make the dream. You do not realise
that you are making them act out for you.... You seem to
waken, and the dream is gone. Yet what you fail to recognise is that what caused
the dream has not gone with it. Your wish to make
another world that is not real remains with you.
A Course in MiraclesT-18.II.5.
What
keeps the dream going is that the world of separation,
specialness and uniqueness can only operate in a dream
state. If we want to be separate we must dream for
separation cannot occur in Heaven, a state of perfect
oneness.
You
dwell not here, but in eternity.You travel but
in dreams, while safe at home.
T-13.VII.17:6-7
You
are at home in God, dreaming of exile but perfectly
capable of awaking to reality.
T-10.I.2:1
As
we grow older many of us realise
that much of the world of separation is painful and is no
longer attractive. However, if some parts of the dream
still seem attractive the dream will continue so we can fulfil these desires. We have
forgotten that it is the absence of desire
which brings happiness, our natural state.
And
what you seem to waken to is
but another form of this same world you see in dreams.
All your time is spent in dreaming. Your sleeping and
your waking dreams have different forms, and that is
all. Their content is the same. They are your protest
against reality, and your fixed and insane idea that you
can change it.
T-18.II.5.
We
have rejected the perfect oneness of Heaven believing we
can create something better. We want to be God and not
God's Son. We know better than God and want to prove it
and, given enough time and lives, we hope to achieve our
goal.
But
who is this "I" that thinks it can improve on God's
creation? This question is rarely asked as it seems
obvious who we are equating
ourselves with (mind, body and emotions). When we seek to
go deeper and enquire who we are we cannot find any real,
eternal "I". Just thoughts, feelings
and physical sensations but nobody who has them.
What is found is awareness but
nobody who is aware.
The
self you made is not the Son of God. Therefore, this
self does not exist at all. And anything it seems
to do and think means nothing. It is neither bad nor
good. It is unreal, and nothing more than that. It does
not battle with the Son of God. It does not hurt him,
nor attack his peace. It has not changed creation, nor
reduced eternal sinlessness
to sin, and love to hate. What power can this self you
made possess, when it would contradict the Will of God?
W-pI.93.5.
The "I"or me is as much a part of the
dream as the rest of the dream. We are simply a thought in
our heads. To find out who we
really are we have to let go all that we have thought
ourselves to be.
Simply
do this: Be still, and lay aside all thoughts of what
you are and what God is; all concepts you have learned
about the world; all images you hold about yourself.
Empty your mind of everything it thinks is either true
or false, or good or bad, of every thought it judges
worthy, and all the ideas of which it is ashamed. Hold
onto nothing. Do not bring with you one thought the past
has taught, nor one belief
you ever learned before from anything. Forget this
world, forget this course, and come with wholly empty
hands unto your God.
W-pI.189.7.
We have
great resistance to letting go our self
image. It's who we have taken ourselves to be. As
Byron Katie has asked "Who
would you be without your story?"
One
day, I discovered I didn't need a personal history, so,
like drinking, I dropped it.
Carlos Castaneda in Tales
of Power
Our life
story may be positive or negative. It does not matter as
it creates our identity which
we cherish and are loath to release. It seems like suicide
to let our image and history go
The
world can teach no images of you unless you want to
learn them. There will come a time when images have all
gone by, and you will see you know not what you are. It
is to this unsealed and open mind that truth returns,
unhindered and unbound. Where concepts of the self have
been laid by is truth revealed exactly as it is. When
every concept has been raised to doubt and question, and
been recognized as made on no assumptions that would
stand the light, then is the truth left free to enter in
its sanctuary, clean and free of guilt. There is no
statement that the world is more afraid to hear than
this:
I do
not know the thing I am, and therefore do not know what
I am doing, where I am, or how to look upon the world or
on myself. Yet in this learning is salvation born. And What you are will tell you of
Itself.
T-31.V.17.
The word
What in the last sentence above
is capitalised to indicate
Spirit. When we have at last emptied ourselves of who we
thought we were a space is created for the Holy Spirit to
tell us who we really are - the Christ - which is eternal,
formless and perfect. This is a return to wholeness and
Oneness and the death of separation. In losing our false
self we become the Self. We are simultaneously nothing and
everything. It is like a character on a cinema screen realising she is just an image
made by light as is everything
on the screen. Although things appear separate it is all
an illusion. The one light illumines all the images on the
screen. She realises her true
reality is the lightbulb in
the projector (God).
When I look
within and see that I am nothing,
that is wisdom.
When I look
without and see that I am everything,
that is love.
And between
these two, my life turns.
—Nisargadatta Maharaj
The
Holy Spirit, ever practical in His wisdom, accepts your
dreams and uses them as means for waking. You would have
used them to remain asleep. I said before that the first
change, before dreams disappear, is that your dreams of
fear are changed to happy dreams.
T-18.II.6.
The ego
greatly fears its end and so the Course mentions we
gradually awake from nightmares, to happy dreams of
forgiveness until we are ready for the full awakening -
the Real World. This does not mean the death of the body,
but the realisation we are
not the body, mind or emotions. We become aware that we
are awareness. Our natural state of peace and quiet joy
returns to our awareness. Our body is now used as a loving
tool of communication as we extend God's love and wisdom
into the world.
God
whose love is every where
can’t come to visit unless you aren’t there. Angelus
Silesius
Reality Versus Thinking
You dwell not here, but in eternity.
You travel but in dreams, while safe at home.
A Course in Miracles T-13.VII.17:6-7
Thoughts (clouds) appear that are
mistaken for reality.
Reality can only be now whilst thoughts are about the
past or future.
Most people's minds are continually
filled with thoughts of which over 90% are repetitive.
We live in a virtual reality and the natural state is
obscured and forgotten.
Only when these thoughts are not taken seriously will
they die from lack of attention and allow peace and joy
to return to their awareness.
If you judge something you make it real.
You cannot forgive and judge.
If you don't judge you don't take it seriously.
Not taking your thoughts seriously undoes the ego by
starving it to death.
Thus the Course asks us to smile gently at our ego
thoughts, to look without judgement.
This is forgiveness.
Forgiveness ... is still, and quietly does
nothing. .... It merely looks, and waits, and judges
not. W-pII.1.4:1,3
A Course in Miracles introduces new concepts or beliefs
to help undo the painful ones. But eventually even these
must be let go.
Forget this world, forget this course, and come with
wholly empty hands unto your God. L.189
As we learn to lose interest in thoughts and concepts
that have no practical significance we make room for the
truth to dawn in our awareness.
All that is asked of you is to make room for truth. You
are not asked to make or do what lies beyond your
understanding. All you are asked to do is let it in;
only to stop your interference with what will happen of
itself; simply to recognize again the presence of what
you thought you gave away.
T-21.II.7.
Can
we stop thinking?
A quiet mind is all you need.
All else will happen rightly,
once your mind is quiet.
As the sun on rising makes the world active,
so does self-awareness affect changes in the mind.
In the light of calm and steady self-awareness,
inner energies wake up and work miracles
without any effort on your part.
- Nisargadatta Maharaj -
This question is bound to arise on the spiritual path. We
are told in many spiritual traditions when the mind
becomes quiet, then spirit or God can enter us. As our
awareness deepens, we can't help but notice a continuous
train of thought in our mind. I'm not talking here about
practical thinking, which is necessary. The American
teacher Adyashanti refers to this type of mind as "toolbox
mind". It's the other 99% of our thinking that I am
referring to..
Today He speaks to you. His Voice awaits your silence, for
His Word can not be heard until your mind is quiet for a
while, and meaningless desires have been stilled.
A Course in Miracles. Lesson 125.
The memory of God comes to the quiet mind. 2 It cannot
come where there is conflict, for a mind at war against
itself remembers not eternal gentleness.
A Course in Miracles. T-23.I.1.
The miracle comes quietly into the mind that stops an
instant and is still.
A Course in Miracles T-28.I.11.
It is easy to make the mistake of trying to make your mind
stop thinking. In my early 20s I was following the path of
Buddhism. I signed up for a seven- day meditation retreat
- vipassana meditation. In this retreat we were supposed
to watch our mind as much as possible, just noting the
thoughts going by. This was meant to be a silent week,
apart from our morning interviews with the meditation
master.
Each day began with a one and half hour group meditation
starting at 6 a.m. in a hut in the garden, then solitary
meditation in one's room and in the gardens until the
final group meditation at 7.30. At 9 o'clock we were
allowed to just give up and relax. I went with the
intention of clearing my mind of all thoughts. Big
mistake! I was astonished at how little control I had over
the thoughts passing through my mind, and stopping them
was a virtual impossibility. Yet I tried as hard as I
could, exhausted myself as well as becoming disappointed
in myself. To make matters worse the group meditation hut
in the garden had a metal roof. Birds and squirrels were
continually running over it during the meditation. Some of
my thoughts included "Why did they build this hut in this
garden for goodness sake!".
Thinking happens. (This could become a new bumper
sticker.) It will probably always happen — on its own, as
it were. The option is NOT think versus decline to think.
The option is, see that thought is occurring OR enter into
it as though it were real life. Learn to see thinking as a
phenomenon, just that. To stay outside of it and just let
it do its thing, without your getting into the ring with
it. You don't have to humor every thought. Jan Frazier
On the third evening of the retreat, while sitting in this
hut, I just gave up. "Let the birds and animals run as
much as they like over my head," I thought. Suddenly my
mind became very quiet and memories from very early
childhood began to surface. They were so interesting I
started thinking again and off I went. But I had learned
something important: to surrender, to give up control,
seemed to be a doorway to a quieter mind.
Another time on the retreat was one evening approaching
9p.m., the time when we could, so to speak, stop being
aware. I was looking forward to 9 o'clock. At the stroke
of nine I collapsed on the bed and fell instantly into an
amazing state of awareness. I could watch thoughts coming
in, saying "My goodness this really is awareness!" But I
still remained the quiet observer, and was not attached to
these thoughts. It was very peaceful and without any
effort. I was reminded of my earlier insight that I
received in the meditation hut - surrender!
All the life you’ve ever lived occurred in a now. The rest
of it is dry cardboard in the mind. Only you keep trying
to invest it with reality. The mind thinks up a thought,
and the ego invests it with reality. That’s what we do.
But there’s nothing that says it has to be that way. The
mind could think up a thought and you could just leave
well enough alone, declining to take that next step. Jan
Frazier
I like to meet and read about people who seem to have had
a permanent awakening, and have lost their sense of
personal identity, feeling at one with everything. Do they
still have thoughts they don't really need? Yes, it
appears that they do. However, they seem to have far fewer
thoughts than they did before their awakening. Finding
themselves in the now they have few thoughts about the
past and future which consumes a lot of our thinking. They
have dropped the thoughts of judgement which also take up
a much of our thinking. Losing the sense of personal self
and feeling one with everyone means there's no one left to
judge, as everyone and everything is actually them.
When the teacher Jack O'Keefe was asked about this she
said, "Yes there are still some thoughts. It's like having
a radio on in the background. You know it's playing but
your not interested in listening to what is saying".
Another time she referred to these thoughts as the surf
noise in the background when you're staying near the sea.
You know the sound is there but you pay no interest.
When Nisargadatta Maharaj was asked if he still had old
selfish ego thoughts he replied "Yes, occasionally one
does appear in my mind. I see it arise, I give it no
attention, and it just dies away."
But what about how "good thoughts"? Should we not hold on
to them? Here is what the Course tells us:
In selecting the subjects for the application of today's
idea, the usual specificity is required. Do not be afraid
to use "good" thoughts as well as "bad." None of them
represents your real thoughts, which are being covered up
by them. The "good" ones are but shadows of what lies
beyond, and shadows make sight difficult. The "bad" ones
are blocks to sight, and make seeing impossible. You do
not want either.
A Course in Miracles. Lesson 4
Thought is at a remove from life. Period. It will never be
otherwise. It doesn’t matter if it’s a “true” thought or a
“good” thought. (The ego doesn’t like that.) The only
useful thing to do in relation to a presently-occurring
thought is to see what it is: a thing produced by the
mind. Not to step into it and live within it, as if a play
could become life itself. When the play is being lived in,
life is being missed.
Jan Frazier
We are clearly being told here to let go of our attachment
to all non-practical thinking. These thoughts just get in
the way of discovering our spiritual identity. So, what to
do?
You need not stop thinking. Just cease being interested.
It is disinterestedness that liberates. Don't hold on,
that is all.
Nisargadatta Maharaj
The Course encourages us to be patient with ourselves,
smile gently at our ego thoughts, to let them come and go
with an effort not to become interested in them. Here is
Jesus's reply to Helen Schucman, the scribe of A Course in
Miracles, when she asked Jesus to get rid of her fear
thoughts.
The correction of fear is your responsibility. When you
ask for release from fear, you are implying that it is
not. You should ask, instead, for help in the conditions
that have brought the fear about. These conditions always
entail a willingness to be separate. At that level you can
help it. You are much too tolerant of mind wandering, and
are passively condoning your mind's miscreations.
A Course in Miracles. T-2.VI.4.
We need to wait and watch. Hoping that these endless
thoughts will start to die down with this practice is just
another thought we get caught with. A large percentage of
our thinking can be taken up with what we think is right
and wrong, good and bad, beautiful and ugly. These are all
ego judgements and we can become very attached to them.
........ for there is nothing either good or
bad, but thinking makes it so.
Hamlet. Shakespeare
As we learn to give up these thoughts we will start to
experience the peace that the Course teaches.
You have no idea of the tremendous release and deep peace
that comes from meeting yourself and your brothers totally
without judgment.
A Course in Miracles. T-3.VI.3.
6. The Seeker’s Quest - A Story
Why wait for Heaven? Those who seek the light are merely
covering their eyes. The light is in them now.
Enlightenment is but a recognition, not a change at all.
Light is not of the world, yet you who bear the light in
you are alien here as well. The light came with you from
your native home, and stayed with you because it is your
own. It is the only thing you bring with you from Him Who
is your Source. It shines in you because it lights your
home, and leads you back to where it came from and you are
at home.
A Course in Miracles. Lesson 188
Once upon a time there was a land called Noisy. All the
people who lived there spent most of their time being
noisy. Everywhere they travelled they made noise. It was
natural for them, for it was all they ever knew. Some
people were a bit more noisy than other people and
sometimes they were judged for that. But, bottom line,
they were all noisy. When the noisy people came together
they all created more noise.
One day a group of noisy people were talking together when
one of them said that he had heard there was something
called ‘silence’. The people wondered what that could be?
Most of the people thought there could not be such a thing
and laughed at the idea. The person who had first spoken
about it claimed that he had had brief moments of silence.
He said they were wonderful, peaceful and joyful. But then
the noise would return again. Most people listening to him
thought he was a fool and laughed at him.
One of the noisy people became interested in what he had
heard. Somehow he felt that there was some truth in what
this man said. He could not even explain it to himself,
just at some level of his being it seemed to ring true and
to be possible. He thought he would try to find this
silence. He became a silence seeker.
He started to spend more and more of his time reading
about silence, going to workshops on silence and
traveling to places where he thought he might find the
silence. He went to temples and mountaintops. He did have
his brief moments of silence and he saw and felt how
wonderful it was. Always the noise would return, however.
He knew he had to redouble his efforts if he were to be
successful. More and more books were appearing about how
to find the silence. He consumed them. He particularly
liked the books (and these were the ones that sold the
most) that stated you could actually possess the silence
along with your noise. You could add the silence to the
noise and have the best of both worlds. They gave all
sorts of ways and techniques for success. This was very
appealing - he could still be noisy and then add the
bonus of silence to himself.
There were also some rather disturbing books and workshops
that said if the silence is to be, the noise cannot be
there as well. But he was the noise! They seemed to be
asking him to commit suicide if he was to know the
silence! This can't be true, he thought. So he decided to
return to the other popular books and workshops. He now
felt much safer and was joyfully looking forward to the
day when he would find that silence and add it to himself.
It takes humans a long time to realize that there is no
concept for God and no direction to Him. The oneness we
crave dissolves the moment we set ourselves on a path. To
stop in the oneness requires dissolution of ourselves, so
we keep moving on our path hastily.
MG
Remember: if you can cease all restless activity, your
integral nature will appear .... live a quiet and simple
life, free of ideas and concepts.
Hua Hu Ching
One of the popular approaches he was taught was that when
he was making noise he needed to fight and suppress it. He
did have moments of success but always the noise would
return again, and sometimes it would be even noisier. When
he spoke about this to his teachers they told him to
redouble his efforts and try even harder to suppress the
noise. So he continued and tried even harder but always
the same results - some success followed by return of the
noise.
He eventually became dispirited, feeling this was all very
unfair considering the efforts he was making. One day he
became so tired with all this seeking, all this effort, he
just gave up. He said to himself that obviously he was
failure and that there was no point continuing. At that
moment there was a wonderful burst of deep silence that
flooded his awareness. He was absolutely amazed. He
realised his true nature was silence and not noise. He had
stopped doing anything to achieve silence and there it
was! He was so excited at what had just happened the noise
returned again. But he had seen something, tasted
something, that was much deeper than before. The silence
came when he gave up searching for silence!
There was a great clue here. He started to visit and study
the people who lived in the silence. He observed that they
only made brief noises to communicate with others. They
all seemed to have the same message for him: don't fight
the noises that you make. They asked him to simply listen
to the noises he makes, not to try to change them, gently
smile at the noises, accept them and start to lose
interest in them.
You are where your mind is. Escape from the thought
sphere, therefore, is the imperative. It is not
accomplished by killing the mind, resisting thought or
similar acts. Instead, it happens quite naturally by
removing attention from thoughts. Without the energy of
attention, thought dies. You need not stop thinking. Just
cease being interested. It is disinterestedness that
liberates. Don't hold on, that is all.
Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj
He learnt that this is a process over time. The noises
will continue to return but without feeding them with
attention they will start to wither and die away. You will
not need to control and suppress them, they will simply
start to stop arising. They are only there because you're
interested in them and think they bring you something. But
if you just step back and watch them quietly, with no
judgement, with a lack of interest in what they offer,
they will simply fade away.
Forgiveness ... is still, and quietly does nothing.
.... It merely looks, and waits, and judges not. A
Course in Miracles W-pII.1.4:1,3
As the noise begins to die, the silence which is always
there will start to appear in awareness. He realised that
when he gave up seeking, by being exhausted in his search,
he stopped being noisy. He saw that fighting the noise,
trying to suppress the noise, was just making more noise.
He was using noise to fight noise - no wonder it never
worked! More effort resulted in more noise. He laughed at
himself, all these years of fighting noise, the
discipline, the effort, was just more noisy behaviour.
What he realised is that it was important to stop the
battle and to relax. Yes, the noises were still there, but
he was learning to smile at them more and not to judge
himself for having noise. At times he would get caught up
in noise again and it would take some while until he
became aware of what had happened. He learned not to feel
guilty. There was a certain effort required in awareness,
but this felt so much more gentle and easy, pulling back
into awareness after catching himself being noisy again.
He smiled in recognition that he'd fallen back into the
old trap of being interested in the noise which allowed
him to be gentle with himself and move back into a space
of simply watching the noises he made.
Gradually he learned not to indulge in the noises so much,
or feed them with his interest. He was content to wait and
watch until the time came and the noise no longer held his
interest. Gradually more and more of his time was spent in
the silence and when he needed to make a noise to
communicate the noise came from the silence and carried
its wisdom and peace.
His early goal of adding the joy of silence to his noise
was seen as impossible. Silence and noise cannot coexist
together. He had spent years trying to achieve this
impossible goal. Although it had not been necessary, he
also realised he still had to do it before he could see
the hopelessness of that approach. Those years of seeking
were not wasted. He saw that he had to exhaust himself as
a seeker of silence before the silence could dawn in his
awareness.
As the silence deepened there were times he experienced
fear. The fear was connected with the insight that to
permanently enter the silence the noise must die. But he
was identified with the noise - who was he without being
noise? It seemed to be in invitation to death, to suicide.
Every man fears this Nothingness, because when he comes
into contact with it, he becomes it in the same way as
flame engulfs whatever it touches. Then, he is no longer
something distinct.
Wu Hsin
This fear held him back from a deeper, permanent
realisation about the truth of who he really was. The
silence always existed, it was eternal, and there could be
no noise without silence; silence was the eternal
background to everything, was always there although not
recognised.
The world can teach no images of you unless you want to
learn them. There will come a time when images have
all gone by, and you will see you know not what you
are. It is to this unsealed and open mind that truth
returns, unhindered and unbound. Where concepts of
the self have been laid by is truth revealed exactly as it
is. When every concept has been raised to doubt and
question, and been recognized as made on no assumptions
that would stand the light, then is the truth left free to
enter in its sanctuary, clean and free of guilt.
There is no statement that the world is more afraid to
hear than this:
I do not know the thing I am, and therefore do not
know what I am doing, where I am, or how to look upon the
world or on myself.
Yet in this learning is salvation born. And
What you are will tell you of Itself.
A Course in Miracles T-31.V.17.
The ones who had entered the silence and now lived there
were aware of this fear. They counselled him that his fear
was unreal, that all he would actually lose was an
illusion of who he thought he was. They gently encouraged
him on, to release his identification with noise and to
surrender into the silence. They told him he would lose
nothing and gain everything. When he needed to make noises
to communicate that would happen naturally and
spontaneously. He would not lose that ability, instead it
would be greatly improved and effortless. He would now
live his life from the silence, and the love and the
wisdom that were there would now guide his life. There
would no longer be effort or decisions to be made. He
would know what to do, when to speak and where to go
without ever having to think about it. His guide now would
be the silence, that was all he would ever need.
Be quiet in your mind, quiet in your senses, and quiet in
your body. Then, when all these are quiet, don’t do
anything. In that state truth will reveal itself to
you.
Kabir
Gently, gently, I trained my mind to suspend its processes
and thoughts. Then (in the windless calm), the flame of
the Lamp, shining steady and bright, Revealed my true
nature unto me.
Lalla
7. What is
Forgiveness?
From the perspective of A Course in
Miracles.
by Michael
Dawson
You have no idea of the tremendous release
and deep peace that comes from meeting yourself and your
brothers totally without judgment.
A Course in
Miracles
T-3.VI.3.
The purpose of
forgiveness is to cause our minds to become quiet, so the
memory of God can return to our awareness. With this will
come an uncaused peace and quiet joy, our natural state.
The memory of God comes to the quiet
mind. It cannot come where there is conflict, for
a mind at war against itself remembers not eternal
gentleness.
T-23.I.1.
The Course
defines forgiveness in many places. I will start with the
shortest definition and work through to some of the longer
ones.
1. Looking
without judgement.
This applies not
only to what is happening in the world but also what is
happening in our thoughts and emotions. This implies the
letting go of concepts like right or wrong, good and bad.
Often in difficult situations that arise we close our
hearts and rely on our mind and its memories for the
correct response to a situation. But laying aside the
commentary of the mind we allow the heart wisdom/Holy
Spirit to function through us and our response will be for
the highest good of everyone.
Forgiveness recognizes what you thought
your brother did to you has not occurred. It does not
pardon sins and make them real. It sees there was no
sin. And in that view are all your sins forgiven.
W-pII.1.1.
2. Smile gently at the
ego.
The ego loves to
be taken seriously. It does not want to be seen as simply
a thought we are invested in, the thought of separation,
specialness and individuality which we dearly cling to.
The more we take the ego seriously, perhaps by feeling
ashamed, angry or guilty, the more we strengthen it. If we
can learn to smile gently at the ego's antics, the more we
allow it to fade away into the nothingness from which it
came. In time we will become less and less disturbed by
our ego’s response. If we don’t feed it it will slowly
fade away revealing the peace and quiet joy underneath.
What is the ego? Nothingness, but in a form
that seems like something. In a world of form the ego
cannot be denied for it alone seems real. Yet could
God's Son as He created him abide in form or in a world
of form? Who asks you to define the ego and explain how
it arose can be but he who thinks it real, and seeks by
definition to ensure that its illusive nature is
concealed behind the words that seem to make it so. Clarification of terms C-2.2.
3. Forgiveness
... is still, and quietly does nothing. .... It merely
looks, and waits, and judges not.
W-pII.1.4:1,3
It is important
to realise that forgiveness, like the miracle, does not do
anything. The practice of the Course is in undoing, not doing.
We simply look at what is happening in our mind and in the
world without trying to change it. In this quiet place, if
some action is required it will come from that quietness,
from being and not judgement. Forgiveness is a process,
our daily classroom. We need to be content to wait and let
this process unfold until the day dawns when we awake to
our spiritual reality.
4. The three stages of forgiveness.
You are not trapped in the world you see,
because its cause can be changed. This change requires,
first, that the cause be identified and then [second]
let go, so that [third] it can be replaced. The first
two steps in this process require your cooperation. The
final one does not.
W-p1.23.5:1-4
In the first
stage we recognise that what upsets us in the world is but
a mirror to what is unhealed or unforgiven in our own
minds.
It is impossible to
forgive another, for it is only your sins you see in
him. You want to see them there, and not in you. That is
why forgiveness of another is an illusion. Song of
Prayer S10
If you hate a person,
you hate something in him that is part of yourself.
What isn't part of
ourselves doesn't disturb us.
Hermann Hesse
If we do not feel
compassion for the another person's negative behaviour
then in some form it must be in us. We do not wish to see
it there so we deny we have a similar characteristic and
project it onto the other person. Thus in the first stage
of forgiveness we had the difficult task of bringing our
projections back to ourselves.
And how else can one dispel illusions
except by looking at them directly, without protecting
them?
T-11.V.2: 2
The form of this
negative behaviour in another may be different in
ourselves. For example, we may get upset and judge when
around loud, angry people. We may never have shown anger
in our lives but deep down it broods silently and
expresses itself in different ways, perhaps by cutting
people off and not talking to them for long periods. The
other person's anger reminds us of our unhealed quiet
anger.
Conflict must be resolved. It cannot be
evaded, set aside, denied, disguised, seen somewhere
else, called by another name, or hidden by deceit of any
kind, if it would be escaped. It must be seen exactly as
it is, where it is thought to be, in the reality which
has been given it, and with the purpose that the mind
accorded it. For only then are its defenses lifted, and
the truth can shine upon it as it disappears.
W-pII.333.1:1-4
In the first
stage of forgiveness we recognise what needs to be
forgiven in ourselves.
In the second
stage our challenge is to let this unforgiveness go. Many
of us build our lives around our stories, our hurts, our
past. We may be living the life of a ‘justified victim’
and feel reluctant to give that up and take on the
responsibility that would come with it. We can no longer
say “Don't expect anything from me because I was abused
when I was young”. The second stage can be more difficult
than the first stage, as we are so attached to our
stories.
Who would you be without your story?
Byron Katie
With the death of
some part of our story life will change, and people will
be aware of the difference. Some will welcome it some will
not. If your forgiveness decreases your co-dependency in
some relationship, your partner will feel it immediately
and may feel threatened by this change. At some level we
know this and we may fear to let forgiveness happen.
Until we are
ready to let go of our hatreds, jealousies, victimhood
etc. the third stage of forgiveness must wait. The Holy
Spirit will never take away from us what we think is of
value to us. We need the courage to let go and step into a
new life no matter what the seeming consequences are. When
we decide that life would be better without holding on to
some unforgiveness it's at that point Spirit shines it
away and we become free.
Below is a prayer
of forgiveness that contains these three steps:
I must have decided wrongly, because I am
not at peace.
I made the decision myself, but I can also
decide otherwise.
I want to decide otherwise, because I want
to be at peace.
I do not feel guilty, because the Holy
Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong
decision if I will let Him.
I choose to let Him, by allowing Him to
decide for God for me.
T-5. VII.6:7-11
False Forgiveness
This section is reprinted from The Findhorn Book of
Forgiveness by Michael Dawson.
The Song of Prayer (supplement to A Course in Miracles)
describes four different types of false forgiveness, referring to
them as different forms of “Forgiveness-to-Destroy”.
It makes the point that although at times some of them
appear charitable, they are all forms of attack and have
nothing to do with true forgiveness.
1. Holier Than Thou
In this form of false forgiveness we take up
a position superior in relation to those we regard as
transgressing. We are the better people and from our
elevated position, we decide to act graciously and forgive
others who are perceived as below our ‘holy’ status. In
this attitude of arrogance, we feel our generous offer of
forgiveness is really undeserved but out of charity we
bestow it upon less worthy others. The true motivation
behind this form of ‘forgiveness’ is to prove that we are
superior, more spiritually evolved than those we forgive.
If there is not sufficient gain to us, then forgiveness
will be withheld.
In this form of false forgiveness, sin is
always seen in another and never in us. No responsibility
is taken for ourselves for the other is solely to blame.
The bad behaviour others exhibit is certainly not in us we
say and so we take the high ground and generously forgive
them, although they really don’t deserve it. Thus we are
safely protected from seeing how similar we are to others
and can continue to maintain our comfortable image of
‘holier than thou’.
2. We Are Both Miserable Sinners
In this form, we no longer assume a superior
position to others. Instead, we see ourselves just as
sinful as our enemies and both worthy of punishment. This
way of thinking can be mistaken for true humility and may
produce a ‘spiritual competition’ over who is the most
sinful and humble. Not yet in our awareness is the concept
of seeing sin as error that simply needs correction and
not judgement and punishment.
3. Martyred Saint
This form of false forgiveness is related to
the ‘holier than thou’ form discussed above. We put on a
face, which shows forbearance and meekness when under
attack by others. The image we portray to the world is
saintly and kindly as we bravely put up with the
unjustified attacks upon us. We may even seek
opportunities to be martyred under the impression that we
are doing God’s work as He is asking us to sacrifice
ourselves on His behalf. The road to heaven is perceived
as one demanding suffering that must be bravely borne with
a gentle smile.
“No pain, no gain” is a modern statement of
this thought. Although it is very true that we have great
opportunities to learn and grow in times of crisis, is it
also true that a loving God would demand pain and
sacrifice before we could return to a state of peace and
joy? Is not this idea of God merely a projection of our
own mind, a God created by us based on our own ideas of
punishment towards those who upset us?
Beneath the mask of the martyred saint lie
feelings of bitterness and pain at the outrage inflicted.
“Here am I doing good work and just look at what others
are doing to me!” is the silent cry of the martyr. Their
suffering face is really an accusing finger pointing at
others which declares them guilty and sinful and worthy of
God’s punishment. Once again evil is seen outside the mind
and having nothing to do with ourselves. The very fact
that we are feeling angry shows we believe in attack even
though we do not openly carry it out.
4. Bargaining and Compromise.
Here we seek to get something in return for
our ‘gift’ of forgiveness. If we find a partner being
unfaithful to us we may decide to forgive as long as their
behaviour is not repeated. If the partner is caught being
unfaithful, again the previous bargain that was struck
between you both has been broken and could now result in a
withdrawal of forgiveness.
We do not see that what we give we also
receive for we must always reinforce in our minds the
thoughts we believe in. For example, if we believe we need
to cheat to get what we want we must also believe that
others value cheating and will try to cheat us. We now
spend our lives trying to protect ourselves from others
cheating us. If, however, we see that what we do to others
we will also do to ourselves we will realise that to give
forgiveness unconditionally to others will mean that we
will also give it to ourselves.